The other day, in the morning, I was watching the Tyra Banks show (which merits a post all it's own) and she had that Sex Talk lady from Oxygen on as a guest. What's her name? Sue something, I think. She's the woman that always has a bunch brightly colored vibrators and dildos sitting on her desk like decorations (which always reminds me of when Tootie and Natalie from Facts of Life bought bongs and put jellybeans in them) Sorry, my ADD...
Anyway, she was talking about sex, as usual, but she said something that really struck a chord with me; something about how men should make a point of telling their women how beautiful (sexy, attractive, hot, insert-the-compliment of your choice here) they are in order to help women relax more and not be so body-conscious etc. thus making sex a more enjoyable experience and one likely to occur more often. Amen, sister! You know that of which you speak!
You'd think this would be common sense. You'd think that this would be the one surefire tip that's been passed from guy to guy since the dawn of time or at least since the dawn of supermodels and Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issues. But somehow I don't think that's the case.
Hello? Guys? Do you want to shag or not? Oh, you do? Then you better get with it and start telling your lady that she's smokin' hot and make it believable.
Yes, believable is what I said. And I say it because while I really want to rekindle the days when Hubz actually did say things like that to me and we had sex all the time, I feel like if I have to ask him or remind him, then when he DOES do it, I'll be thinking "Yeah...you're just saying that because I told you to" and then I'll just get irritated and not be in the mood and he'll be like "Whoa... complimenting her was a bad idea. I'll never do that again" and we'll never have sex anymore for real.
I can't speak for anyone else but while I don't look exactly like I used to, I still feel like I look pretty damn good for having two kids and being a few years shy of forty. Yes, I need to lose that bit of baby weight but I'm tall and it's spread out fairly well. Let's just say I'm not repulsive and I'm reasonably sexy when I make the effort, okay? It shouldn't be that hard to compliment me. He does say I look nice every now and then and he does give me the obligatory "No, you're not fat, you look great for someone who just had a baby" but that's NOT what I'm talking about here. I need to know that I'm the one he's HOT for. Is that so unreasonable? Ladies? Guys?
Part of me hopes he reads this post even though he's not allowed to read my blog and gets a clue without having to get it directly from me. Or maybe one of you guys can tell him about "The Tip" --> "Compliment your woman and make her feel hot and if there's not an 8 month old sleeping 3 feet away she'll definitely have sex with you."