Wednesday, December 14, 2005


My baby is so annoying this week. I love him with all my heart so it's okay for me to say that. He's really high-maintenance. It was my recollection that babies got easier after 6 months or so. Not this one. I always thought my daughter was kind of difficult but in retrospect, she was positively mellow compared to him and she, herself, is kind of intense. He goes from 0 to 60 in about 3 seconds. One minute he's sitting there perfectly fine and content and the next, he's shrieking in that horrible squealing way that he has and I can literally feel my eardrums rattling. Really. And what is it that elicits such horror from the child? Oh I don't know... maybe I'll try to change his diaper or put some socks on him. Perhaps I'll do something realllllly crazy and try to take a dangerous object away from him (he grabs everything in a 3 foot radius so he does occasionally get hold of something he shouldn't have) And if I put him down or walk away from him for a split second I'm pretty sure this is what his screams would translate as if I could interpret it--> "Holy Fucking Shit!!!!!! Red Alert!!! The lady with the boobs is walking away!!!!!! Commence shrieking!!!!!"

You might think I'm exaggerating but I assure you — I am not. Nobody believes me because when we are out anywhere, he's too distracted to do the evil baby routine and he mostly just smiles and gurgles at everyone. Awwww...isn't little Damien cute? Okay, that was mean. He's not like that demonic child in The Omen. He's more like, say, Rosemary's Baby. Alright, alright. I'll stop comparing my precious, adorable baby to evil pop-culture icons.

Thanks for humoring me and for understanding the absolute necessity of levity in the life of a stay-at-home mom. Venting and humor keep us sane :-)


Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home